Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Hypocrite Alert: "Spare A Square" Crow and Her EcoBat Sidekick David

The best thing about global warming is HOW EASY it is to point out the hyprocrites, you know, those celebrities and politicians who say 'do as I say, not as I do.' With global warming, they are such easy pickings because they are such blatant abusers of resources and energy waste machines.

Take Cheryl Crowe and Laurie David, please! "Brother, can you spare a square and save the world" Crowe tells us that we need to only use ONE square to tidy ourselves after taking care of business.

The quote that just keeps on giving:

"Now, I don't want to rob any law-abiding American of his or her God-given rights, but I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required."

In the meantime, Crowe is on her 'ecofriendly' decked out 2mpg bus with an entourage including another NOT ecofriendly bus and a van and several other cars bringing up the pack. And Laurie David, the wife of the creator of Seinfeld, is right there cheering her on. In fact, Ms. David is attending many of Ms. Crowe's 'ecotour' venues FLYING IN ON HER PRIVATE JET! Upon arrival, she gets into her 5mpg limousine and heads off to her luxury 1000 sq ft suite before going out with Ms. Spare-a-square to tell the peasants how they need to cut back because they are ruining the earth!

Can you say, PUH-LEEZE!

I will say I love one thing about global warming - it has never been easier to "SPOT THE HYPOCRITE". They are like giant sitting ducks, and the slashing is easy and so well deserved.

For the record I conserve. My house is 1400 sq ft and I drive a 4 cylinder car and I try to save on heating and cooling because unlike Ms. Crowe and Ms. David, a utility bill means something to me. But I don't believe I'll be adopting the 'spare a square' program as a central theme in my own personal conservation movement.

From the Seinfiedl Show - "The Stall"

SEINFELD SCRIPT by Daniel Khamsing (kboy@cryogen.com)

76th episode

Season 5, number 12

Original broadcasting date: January 6, 1994

Written by Larry Charles

Directed by Tom Cherones

regular cast:

Jerry Seinfeld (Jerry)

Julia Louis-Dreyfus (Elaine)

Michael Richards (Kramer)

Jason Alexander(George)

guest starring:

Jami Gertz (Jane)

Dan Cortese (Tony)

(the bathroom)


what a dope!

uh..excuse me

umm.. I'm sorry

this is.. this is kind of embarrassing but.. there's no toilet paper over here


(from the stall on Elaine's right)

are you talking to me?


yeah.. I

I just forgot to check

so if you could just spare me some


no I'm sorry




no I'm sorry, I can't spare it


you can't spare it??


no there's not enough to spare

ELAINE well I don't need much, just 3 squares will do it

JANE I'm sorry I don't have a square to spare, now if you don't mind

ELAINE 3 squares? you can't spare 3 squares??

JANE no I don't have a square to spare, I can't spare a square

ELAINE oh is it two-ply? cause it it's two-ply I'll take one ply, one ply, one, one
puny little ply, I'll take one measly ply

JANE look, I don't have a square and I don't have a ply (flushing and leaving)

Elaine no no, no no, don't don't, I beg you

(the movie theater)


(eating pop corn)

hmm I love this artificial flavoring
I like it better than butter
I think it's more consistent

JANE you would not believe what just happened to me in the bathroom

JERRY what?

(offering pop corn to Jane)
(elsewhere in the same theater)


TONY hey
hey? where is my popcorn babe?

ELAINE what?

TONY my popcorn, you were supposed to get me popcorn
what? would you forget about me babe?

ELAINE you would not believe what just happened to me in the bathroom

JANE I mean.. a person needs a certain amount of toilet paper to be covered.. I
simply could not spare it

this woman just didn't get it, she kept harassing me

ELAINE 3 squares!! that's all I was asking for! 3 squares!

JANE she wouldn't stop

"help me! help me!"

she was *insane*

ELAINE I was begging her

"please! please!"
she was *insane*